Dear Dr. Romance
Five months ago I started talking to a guy whom I had known at school many years ago. We are now adults. He is not married, both of us have never been married. We spent a weekend together just as old friends. Went walking, beach, dinner, share the same room.
We talk to each other from time to time but on general issues. We chat on the phone or online. He had dinner three times at my house. He is a hard working person. Spends a lot of time at the office. I do want to have a relationship with him. But I am not sure if I should tell him how I feel. He knows that I am independent financially and have my own house...not sure if that may scare him.
He is a very decent and intelligent guy, and at my age I don't think I would find someone like him easily. But I am afraid if I tell him, then it would affect our friendship. Any advice would be appreciated.
Dear Reader:
Yes, I think you should tell him, but in small bits, not all at once. Take your time, let the relationship build, and let him know how much you like spending time with him. Don't be too eager, give him a little space, make him come after you a little bit. Try reading my articles, "Guidelines for Successful Dating"; Dating: The Fine Art of “Squirrel Hunting” and "Guidelines for Relating With Love" which will help you understand how the relationship is supposed to develop. How to Be Happy Partners: Working It Out Together has a lot of helpful exercises and information to teach you how to communicate intimately with someone.
For low-cost phone counseling, email me at [email protected]
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