Dear Dr. Romance:
What I have read on your site is interesting - may I ask you to comment on one point?
In his book 'Shyness' Philip Zimbardo states " It is as if the ego were set adrift in a paper boat, aware that a storm is brewing just over the horizon." Therefore we have the 'dread' that non-shys don't feel and don't understand but try to help with compliments etc - which are nice but useless. This 'dread' is an internal abyss unseen and unseeable and inexplicable to non-shys whose childhood was different - we, the truly shy feel the terror of absence of ego and the anarchy of the Id as well as the overpowering judgements of the superego. We have a lack of empathy that excludes intimacy and dictates a lifetime of superficial living.
I would be grateful if you could respond.
Dear Reader:
What your author describes, I call autophobia: the fear of self. Unfortunately, when you're afraid of your own feelings and thoughts you also become afraid of others and their response to you, so you're trapped. "Resolving Inner Anarchy," "Your Bestest Friend - You" , "Do You Understand Emotional Intelligence", and Your Inner Detective will help you understand this issue more fully. It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction is very helpful for understanding and overcoming autophobia. My newest book, 52 Weeks to Better Mental Health: A guided Workbook for Self-exploration and Growth is a prompt-and-response recreation of how I help people with problems like yours.
For low-cost phone counseling, email me at [email protected]
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